Miss Margaret

My cousin, and friend, Shannon had her beautiful baby this past Friday, 8/28/09. They chose not to find out the sex of the baby and rather be surprised. Shannon was convinced she was carrying a little boy, but surprise surprise, it was a beautiful baby girl! Margaret Lillian VanHeest came into the world at 9lbs 13oz and 22in! She is gorgeous, and is going to break all sorts of hearts! Adam and I were able to go up Sunday and visit them all. It was especially exciting since my Aunt and Uncle were in town from South Carolina and visits with them are rare. Shannon looked beautiful and Kyle was beaming--they are going to be incredible parents. That little girl is so lucky to have them.

Adam painted a ceramic elephant bank for Margaret and we brought champagne for a toast. As Margaret began to cry, Kyle toasted "May she grow to be all the more intelligent, all the more beautiful....and...." then my Aunt Becky jumped in to finish it off "and out of this stage!". It was funny, every so often someone would joke "I guess this is pretty good birth control, huh?" but the thing was, it had just the opposite effect, it made me ache to be ready for that part of our lives.

Now, before you panic--read that again,I know we're not ready, and we won't rush into a lifetime commitment prematurely. Still, it's hard knowing so many of our friends are in that place already and we're not. When we left that night, our conversation in the car almost immediately turned to having children. We've had the conversation before, but it seemed alot more relevant this time. How many did we want, what were our hopes for our children, how did we think we'd handle pregnancy and parenting? I know Adam will be an incredible father, but I don't know what parenting will have in store for me...

Birthday

Happy Birthday to Me! :) Today was wonderful. Although I feel like there is nothing glamorous about turning 23, Adam made it a wonderful and special weekend. We spent the morning in Corinth at Cynthia & Mark's (his sister and brother-in-law) hanging out and eating lunch. For as close as we live, we never get to see each other-which is especially lame since we always have fun when we get together with them. At 2pm, we went to see the Broadway Tour of Mamma Mia--Adam's birthday surprise for me. Do gifts get any better then that?! No, they don't! Afterwards was dinner at....Piranhas (we're so predictable!) and an August birthdays party at the Reagans. We ended the night with a treat--live Mariachi music down the street. I am so not kidding, this guy was using a keyboard, microphone and speakers (facing out to the street)at 3am. Yes. So, we danced and hung out with the Mariachis. Good Day.

I quit

Well, I did it. I quit my job. I even cried a little bit. But he was really understanding--I think he kind of saw it coming. He'll be out of town the next 2 weeks, so that will be exhausting, but after that I'm done. I did tell him I will work a couple weekends if he needs me to until he finds someone else.....

YAY!!!!!!!!

Quitting

I could cry. Well, more accurately, I want to go back to crying again...like I was earlier tonight, but I will act like a grown-up, I will...I will... We've come to an interesting intersection for us. I have been working at PM for almost 3 years now, and I have LOVED it! My boss is the kind of boss you spend all your time wishing you had, thinking about while you secretly curse your evil manager when he's not looking. My boss actually cares about me, is incredibly generous with time off, and insanely fair in the work place. The problem is...I've reached the point in our work-employee relationship that PM is no longer the place for me. Not only no longer the place, but it is actually starting to make me an anxious, irritated mess. Not exactly what I need. AND, I was just given a revised job offer, originally meant to be part-time my new job offer is for a full-time position...one that actually pertains to what I want to do after I have a Masters, mastered. Not just a job either, but one I really REALLY wanted! The problem is that while the employee is ready to quit and leave, I harbor major guilt over abandoning my friends and boss. I've discovered that's the problem about having a job you love, you can't just nonchalantly walk to the back and tell em "thanks, but I believe I'm done here". I have actually shed big, sad, crocodile tears at the mere thought of having to tell them "these next two weeks will need to be my last two". I feel guilty, ungrateful, irresponsible, and half-crazy. *sigh* But I am writing it out here, hoping for some kind of release. Maybe if I write this I will not cry half as much tomorrow when I try to explain my thought process and needs to his confused and worried face.

Or maybe I'll get lucky, and find out I don't mean half as much to him. Maybe he'll just say "alright. two weeks", turn and go on about his business. Then I could move on about mine.

...........except I think that would be much, much worse.......

Mongolia Pictures

I can't figure out how to add this to my sidebar here, so instead I'm just posting the link....here are all 379 Mongolia Pictures, should you care to look!

http://picasaweb.google.com/kissykeikocakes/Mongolia2009#

Post-Mongolia

So....since making it through the 30+ hours of travel back from Mongolia, I have had no luck beating the jet-lag blues. Perhaps some Ambien would have been a good thing...I have been using the 'NyQuil' approach, but am having trouble staying asleep through the night. Today I couldn't fall asleep until 8am (yes) and woke up at 4pm. Blerg!

Sadly enough...I find myself missing Mongolia. Or our experience there. I feel a little hollow and purpose-less without a daily agenda and 15 other people to share it with. *shrug* Odd. I really, really want to go back and make it some semi-regular part of my life. Somehow.

I've been a lot quieter since getting back. (this is truly shocking) I've felt like blogging, and reading, and journaling....sitting in silence and thinking. I finally called my mother today, but other than that the only person I've felt like talking to is Adam. Maybe because I don't want to break the trip's spell?

My house in little Mexico has never seemed so glamorous and inviting as after this venture to Mongolia---with tiny hard beds, bad water, lack of plumbing, lack of electricity, and no Adam! My bed has been a wondrous hideaway for my aching, confused body these past days...trying to figure out "what time is it?" and "where am I?".

I am happy to be home. Very happy. But, I miss Mongolia.

Don't tell.
PK

Blerg

I have accomplished nothing today. Yesterday looked like this "a hair cut"....today was "post office". Blerg. I have absolutely no desire to go to work at Piccolo Mondo, mostly because I'll telling them that my time there has come to an end and the following weeks will be my last there. :( I'll be happy to be done working there, but I feel really guilty quitting....I've worked there just short of 3 years, and my boss has been I-N-C-R-E-D-B-L-E but it really is time to go. I just dread telling him that.....and all my friends I work with....

Ick. It makes my chest hurt thinking about it.



Anxiety stinks.

Just two more weeks....

Day 4 in Mongolia

My Tuesday began at 6am today. After some much needed coffee and toast, I was able to capture this wonderful picture that's the view from outside my room. The walls everywhere are fences around the properties. In Mongolia, having a fence is a trump card. You can have the proof you bought the land, but if someone else comes along and fences it before you, they own it. The round tent you see in the picture is a yert, here they call it a ger. Many people use them as homes, though they are only ever 10* cooler or warmer than outside-nothing but a large tent-type structure. At wealthier homes, many people have yard guards living in the gers, to keep people from breaking in and stealing. In other yards, you see multiple gers for multiple families on one property.

After breakfast, we headed out to the grocery store to get some juice boxes to take as a treat to the kids at Mitch & Baljamaa's feeding center by the dump. The grocery store really was a lot like our grocery stores back home...until you round the corner. There, staring at me, was a large collection of sheep heads and sheep hearts. Not something we through in the cart! We headed out to the 2nd feeding center that Mitch & Baljamaa run. This one was out by the city dump where the kids are unable to go to school because their parents have them work in the dump for $1-$2 a day sorting through the trash to find recyclables. The kids were older then the other center, about 10-15 and really spent little time at the center aside from lunch. Mitch had raised enough money together to do some construction at the center, making concrete walls and a sections for the kids to bathe since they're covered in so much filth. After we helped serve lunch and played with the kids-painting nails and passing out gifts, we headed over to see the conditions these kids are living in by working at the dump. This was the first time I cried. When we pulled into the dump we saw a 10 year old run and jump onto the back of a running dump truck and climb up the back. He immediately started sorting through all the trash and when the truck began to dump they didn't wait for the kid to jump off, he just tumbled out with the trash. Around the dump, kids were scattered everywhere. The smaller ones were playing in the trash while their siblings
worked.

We made a drive outside the city to the Orphanage summer house they rent for $150 a month. Out in the country, the kids are able to run around and play without running the risk of being hit by a car or being in as much filth. The kids at the orphanage were almost totally different then the city kids. Most of them had been in the orphanage since they were infants, abandoned roadside. Brought up by the 3 ladies who work there, they get more consistent parenting, balanced meals & plenty of time to run and play. The majority of the kids were little babies & toddlers, the oldest was about 9.

Most of the little ones were napping when we arrived, like little dolls. We were able to tour the house and meet the workers before playing with all the children. The balloon animals were a major success, thanks to Tim & Joey, although the kids were small enough that throughout the afternoon there was a pretty steady *pop* *pop* as they kids squeezed or bit the balloons while they played.

Face painting went a lot smoother than in the city, with drawn up templates they could point at & choose.

At one point I could no longer hold it, broke down, and used the 'outhouse'. These are basically 3 sides of metal, tied together with a deep hole beneath a squat board, lots and lots of bugs down there. N-A-S-T-Y. But, I survived. (barely) God bless hand sanitizer and baby wipes! After spending the afternoon playing with the kids, we drove back to the city for a second English lesson. After practicing quick introductions, one of the students, who was about 18, suggested we discuss our dreams, "because dreams are a good thing, right?". No one had really prepped us for what would be discussed, and we found this a bit strange, but went ahead and talked with them. When it came time to leave, it was explained to us that the concept of having a dream or life goal is very new. Until about 3 years ago, no one even understood the concept. They associate Americans with dreams & life goals, and wanted to hear about them, because it's so foreign to them to have a plan for their lives since Communism hasn't been gone for long (it's still not really gone, it's just not the official government, but the party is still often in power and the government controls like everything). With the lesson over, we headed back to the house where we were treated by Mitch making us all some gumbo, and spending time talking to the four of them about their life in Mongolia.

Today we piled into a spall local cafe to enjoy some Western breakfast at a popular spot owned by a Cuban man & a woman from Camaroon. I was a little disappointed that breakfast wouldn't be some extreme foreign fare, but I was appeased with an enormous potato pancake. They are my new favorite...I can't even remember what else I ate, excpet that it was all accompanied with a nice, cold (rare here) Coke! We then headed to Stephanie & Chris's feeding center to see what they do, help out & play with the kids. When we arrived, I was amazed to see a tiny building with a big yard. For some reason I was expecting a large, fancy building with an industrial kitchen and shiny linoleum floors. The entire center was about the size of my living room. Evidently, even when you own the property it is really really difficult, especially as a foreigner, to get the clearance to build, hook up water, anything---so they have a small pieced together building with no running water. The main line literally runs along the back of the building, but they are still waiting to get hooked up. (they've been here 2 years) In the meantime, water for the center must be carried up in barrels from the well, just like everywhere else. Here, they feed anywhere from 10-60 kids every day, generally for only about $15. When we arrived the kids were shouting in Mongolian, "oh no! so many teachers!!" We took a very brief tour (as you can imagine), and met the woman who does the cooking, then turned our attention to the kids. As soon as they spotted cameras, many were striking "American" poses, arms flexed, or rock & roll hands. Chris, who runs the center began telling us about some of the children there.

One boy who was no bigger then an average 10 year old was 15, another about the size of a 6 year old, was 12. Their growth and development had been horribly stunted from lack of nutrition, and many times food in general. When we brought out the face paint, we had their undivided attention. Girls were asking for flowers, hearts and kitty faces, while the boys wanted 'tattoos' like our friend Joey. Soon all the boys had flamed bellies and big anchors on their arms, proudly showing them off. It was amusing that even without being able to speak, they could communicate with us, pointing out others paintings or clasping their hands for "please ONE MORE!!" When lunch was about to be served, we joined them inside to help plate the food and pass it out. I was expecting rice and a few vegetables, but it was 2 scoops of rice, and 3 different dishes with it, a full and colorful meal Through the center, they not only get meals, but they get well-balanced, healthy meals. After lunch, we were able to give the kids coloring books, puzzles and balls, they were very excited when they could tell us "thank you", one of the English phrases they've learned. What's even more amazing about the free center is that the couple who runs it is only a few years older then Adam and I, with two small kids. They knew the kids by name, and were so happy to get to show us what a difference a little help in that community really makes, especially when these kids have little else. What's interesting is that they get a lot of flack from the Buddhists who's temple is by the center. They shout over the wall "GO HOME!" "STOP BRAINWASHING OUR KIDS", but they have no involvement in the community, and are doing nothing to fight the starvation many of these kids face. I knew alcoholism was bad in Mongolia, but Mitch (who runs several centers and an orphanage) told us 80% of Mongolian men are alcoholics, and could care less about caring for their families. It is consider a foreign concept to take steps to care for and protect your family. Many children are left in gutters to die or be taken at as young as infancy. This is exactly what happened to their adopted daughter Mishka when she was 7 weeks old. They also told us that here in Mongolia, the child mortality is 40%--4 out of every 10 children won't make it to 18. By stepping into these communities and providing these children with what their families can't, Manna is literally saving lives.

After our day at the center, we were given the option of going to Mitch & Baljmaa's or recoup at the guest house before the English lesson. Julie, Stacie and I opted to stay behind and wait for the them to pick us up in 2 hours. When 5 o'clock hit, we started looking around for the car to show up...waiting and checking, waiting and checking...we took a trip down the hall to ask the others where they thought the others might be, and realized we were the only ones left behind. And apparently forgotten. What we missed was practicing conversational English with young adults and singing some Beatles hits. Instead, we played a game of hearts and thought of all the ways to taunt Keith when he returned. Tomorrow we are supposed to go out to Mitch's feeding center and then to the orphanage they're running to play with the children and do some construction. Good night from Mongolia, and good morning to you in Texas!

Days 1&2 in Mongolia

Got to the airport at 5am for our 7:45am flight, and was met with a bit of a scare when they told me I had no reservation....at 5am, this sort of thing is really to much...Turns out, Keith has made the reservation under the wrong name, and they went ahead, after some explanation and gave me my ticket. (This was MUCH more interesting once we reached China.) The morning flights were uneventful, our first to Seattle with a 4 hour layover, followed by the dreaded 11 hour flight to Beijing! It really wasn't as bad as expected. I lucked out with 2 seats alone on the side, so I was able to kind of lay down in a ball and sleep part of the way. We had personalized televisions just like first class, though the selection was mainly Chinese hits with some random American hits peppered in like "Sleepless in Seattle" and "Crash"...It was your typical, long flight with minor changes like beef & noodles for lunch, Chinese flight attendants and English translations. When we got within an hour of China things started to get a little weird...Along with our customs forms we had health forms to fill out with questions like "have you come into contact with a sick person in the last week?" and "check any that applies" next to symptoms like runny nose, aches, headache, etc--all fairly common in travelers. This seemed strange but no big deal. And then they came to take our temperature. Yes, you read that right. They scanned us, which was not as invasive, but equally weird. They then announced "all passengers cover nose & mouth" and sprayed down the cabin to disinfect it.... We all kept looking at each other like "are they for real?!" Once we got off the plane, we had to walk through infra-red body scanners that were trying to detect "too high" of body heat. There were signs everywhere for quarantine rooms and all employees wore masks. As we went through to get our passports stamped and turn in our forms, I heard Joey say "just from the plane--I have allergies" and then he was whisked off. Apparently he had made the fatal mistake of trying to be honest and marked the box "runny nose". He was inspected and detained for about 20 minutes, after checking him out they demanded to see his medicine and one man came out triumphantly with NyQuil to show his senior officer. They finally let him go, but Joey had to suffer our teasing the rest of the day. Moral of the story---China is scarier then you thought. (some people can be detained indefinitely) We had a 5 hour layover in Beijing and were able to get something to eat in the airport and explore before our 8:30pm flight. When we went to check in we got yet another surprise, out of the 16 of us, only 7 showed up with reservations and the flight was oversold...We had to wait on the floor in front of check in for an hour and a half before they were able to let us know how many seats showed up available. Luckily we all got on, but we had a serious problem with me. On my passport I'm listed as Kaitlin Owens, middle names Marie O'Connell, but on my tickets Keith had put me as Kaitlin OConnellOwens. Finally after many attempts on my part to explain, the gentlemen said "you Owens?!" Finally! He understood! He smiled, and handed me a printed boarding pass with my name, "Owens, Kaitle". *sigh* Security was also interesting, a scan and then a full body rub down, not the pat down like the US---in China it was grabbing and touching everywhere you never wanted to be grabbed or touched...by the time we got to the gate, we were all half dead and laying on the cold tile in wait. Our last flight was only 2 hours long, though one of the scariest I have ever-EVER been on with awful turbulence. We landed at midnight and had officially been traveling for 30 hours.

When we came out of the airport we were stunned by the dark silence. There are no city lights except what's on the buildings or coming from the houses. There isn't a single street light or street sign unless you're in the center of downtown--even then they're really seen as suggestions and while you are supposed to drive on the right side of the road, it's not seen as a requirement. Some roads are VERY poorly kept but paved, while the rest are half-gutted dirt roads. We made our frightful way to the Manna Guest House where we'll be for several days. After being up for nearly a whole day before traveling for 32, plus a 14 hour time difference, all I could manage to do was a quick hot shower before sinking into bed. Day 2 we will be heading out to the feeding centers to play with the kids, help serve lunch and get a chance to talk with those who work for Manna.
This was horrible bottled water in Bejiing that was flavored, we didn't see the English name until after purchase...