29.5wks

Today was a flurry of activity and emotion. 001, who is usually veeery active hadn't budged much in the last 24hrs and I finally called the midwives at 1:30pm. After explaining that I didn't feel her much yesterday, aside from when we blasted Beethoven's "5th Symphony" on my belly and I chugged a sugary drink, and today there had been nothing, they had me go down to the hospital for maternal observation.

In the end, thank God, everything is just fine.

It turns out that my dear girl had turned inward, and because of the added anterior placenta (which moved up and is no longer blocking my cervix-YAY!) it is very hard to feel her right now. They monitored her heart rate for 30min, and it was a pretty consistent 150, and while I could hear the static over her movements on the monitor I only felt her about three times in the whole half hour. (I did feel her more during the ultrasound)

I was a mess, and it took me most of the afternoon to calm down. First I was crying out of fear, then for feeling like a foolish worrier, then for being so grateful she's such a strong little girl. I later recounted my fears and emotions to my mother who told me, "You're being prepared to worry the rest of your life about this little girl." I suppose it's true, and I hadn't much thought about it until now, but I will spend the rest of my life worried she's safe, healthy, happy, confident, street smart, responsible, strong.... My mom also made me feel better about being so overwhelmed with the responsibility of caring for this girl alone in pregnancy. Yes, Adam can do a lot, and my parents give wonderful advice, but ultimately I'm the one keeping this baby safe, providing the nutrients she needs, following the rules to do the best I can for her, and trying to judge when I need help for us, or for her. When my mother was 8mo pregnant with me she ate oysters. Bad oysters. She became so sick that on top of throwing up her stomach was literally convulsing, and all she could think about is "what is this doing to the baby?!" I guess it's a universal rule, motherhood, even as early as pregnancy, is all about worry and wonder.

Our girl was quick to reassure me though. Steady heartbeat, faint wiggles and an ultrasound view full of plenty of fluid and a definite girl. We were also tickled to learn that while the average baby at this stage is 2.5lbs, our girl weighs in at about 3.25lbs and is over the 15in rule. It looks like she may be a tall girl like her mama. The picture from this week wasn't too great, she has continued her signature "not my face" move. Maybe next time there will be a better picture to go with a more relaxed appointment. In the meantime, here's a glimpse of our girl.