Things I Learned This Weekend

Over the past few days we have been engaging in the ever popular "clean it, do it, organize it, fix it, throw it out, people are coming" spree. We have learned some things along the way:

1. Onions your husband cut months ago, stored in tupperware and hid in the back of refrigerator will not look bad, but they're baaaaaaad. So bad in fact, they will cause the tupperware lid to swell. Do not, I repeat, do not bother to try and clean your $1.47 tupperware and save it. Not worth the kitchen smell, especially when you toss it anyway.

2. Remember that fancy vacuum you registered for when you got married? The one that's been broken for 3 months? Fix your vacuum. Stop driving across town to borrow your mother-in-law's. You are a lazy lady.

3. Peaches and Cream Oatmeal is an acceptable dinner option for you. But when you promise your husband you'll cook dinner...this may be falling short of what he expected.

4. You are definitely a bonafied pregnant lady, you just told your husband you couldn't wait for Tuesday to come. Why? Well that's when your new maternity clothes arrive!

5. After going through your keepsake box you realize you were even more girly-girl then you thought and there is no hope of a gender neutral childhood treasure making it into the room. You must have a girl, there's no way around it.

6. In your 'special box' (see above) you will re-discover your pink kit-cat-clock, complete with a pearl necklace. How did you forget you owned this? This only re-affirms that you need to have a girl...but if you are boy-blessed you decide you will simply have to buy a blue one...maybe without the pearl necklace though.

7. Your husband knows all the words to 'Alejandro', and he's the worst dancer you've ever seen. You are reminded how much you love him when he serenades you & 'dances' while doing the dishes.

8. While comparing physical attributes between you and your partner, and what you hope and think your babe will inherit, the dancer in you makes in appearance with "I just hope if it's a girl she gets your feet. Your arches are BEAUTIFUL!"

9. Your husband will clean the backyard out in preparation for visitors and constantly refer to it as "Poop Smithing". And chuckle.

10. The book collection...ok, ok, your book collection is so out of control your husband will politely suggest that you put some of the ones you read less often away. AWAY! What is he? Nuts?!

11. While organizing 001's book collection, you will start to read the ones you're less familiar with. Conclusion---baby books are mostly terrible. TERRIBLE. There is a reason you bought the ones you loved as a child, they're the only good ones. (Which brings me to, how much do I LOVE "Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile" and "Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel")

12. You have stopped re-laying news info to your husband, but rather scenarios from assorted mommy & daddy blogs.

13. Never say "And I haven't thrown up in WEEKS!" Congratulations, you will spend the next 5 hours running to the bathroom and throwing up. For absolutely no reason. Well, other then 001.

14. Yay! You bathed the dogs! You even thought to do it outside, so you wouldn't have to wash the bathroom. Did you consider the fact that grass doesn't seem to want to grown on the right side of your yard, and that you were leaving them out to dry in the sunshine? Yay! You have muddy dogs!

15. All you want is a dark beer. One good, cold, dark beer. Did I mention you're 19wks pregnant? And hate beer?