The List

I know I'm just hitting (just?!) 36wks this Saturday, but my veins are running full of panic. Things, even crazy things, that I MUST have done as soon as possible. (Read:NOW)

In no particular order, my list includes, but is not limited to:

1.Washing all Baby Clothes and Linens---why does this seem overwhelming?

2. Having Adam replace her light with a ceiling fan

3. Finding a screen for her room

4. We have NO BABY TOWELS! Worse, I can't commit myself to any because they all seem thin or itchy. I nearly lost it in Target the other night...

5. Clean out, deep clean and wash the car.

6. Clean car needs to be rid of the two spots of bumper sticker residue. (Yes, I know this doesn't affect baby...I can't help it, it's driving me mad)

7. Send out shower thank yous which are now almost two weeks old. Where did I put all my friends addresses?!?

8. Write our birth plan. By Saturday. We are supposed to take this to Bradley class Saturday morning, and to our appointment with the midwives Tuesday. I'm glad to envision and put together an idea of what we'd like, but embarrassed to actually do it and have other people read it. Sad?

9. Finish my scrapbook of our life before baby. I've been stuck completing Christmas for the past 3 months.

10. Catch up her scrapbook and create some pages for once she's here.

11. Make a drop off at Goodwill.

12. Before she's here I NEED the house decorated for the fall/Halloween, or it won't happen and I love holiday decorations! (I know this shouldn't matter...)

13. Why can't I keep our room clean?!

14. I really need to make and execute a shopping list for my "obscure" labor & delivery goods. Things we've had recommended like; honey straws, lolly pops, pads or depends (HA), etc.

15. Pack.our.go.bag.

16. Make some kind of plan for our dogs. What do we do with them when we go into the hospital? Must make a plan.

17. Buy replacement tubing for pump.

18. Sanitize the pump.

19. Order our pre-fold diapers, snappis and wetbag.

20. Call the property manager about that broken closet light...

21. Put the cling sunshades up in the car for the baby.

22. Pre-register for the hospital.

23. Put away all the random things piling up around our house.

24. Exchange Kitri's muzzle for one that fits for night time, or I will kill her when she wakes up the baby.

25. Measure space for blowup mattress and replace our broken one for Mom and Dad.

26. Chiropractor

27. Are we officially set with the pediatrician?

28. Tour the hospital.

29. Buy celebration champagne and cigars (for my parents and Adam). I know this one really isn't urgent, but its personal importance to me has it nagging me constantly.

30. Organize her clothes better by size so I can see at a glance what is what.

31. Find her at least one more heavy blanket since she only has the one.

32. How the heck do you swaddle a baby? Must learn.

33. Never mind swaddling, how are we supposed to use cloth diapers?! Oh.God. Must learn that too...

Faces Through Time

While trying to distract myself from the fact that I have a projected 4 weeks and 5 days left (not that I'm keeping track...) of pregnancy and everything from eating to standing up seems to be exhausting and overwhelming; I have been trying to finish up this year in our scrapbook while I still can. My sister-in-law Cynthia joined me today for a couple hours and brought some pictures of a young Adam for me to enjoy. So, while I know I've shown you all our baby pictures I thought it might be fun to include a few of the later years and let the imagination wander about 001.

With my Pappy and little brother during one of our summers in Hawaii.

Adam at Christmas in Amarillo.

Ready for church in the Pawtuckett cold.

Adam, the Boyscout, on a fishing expedition.

Alaska, before Ry was attacked by a wolf. (no joke)

Adam in the Santa Fe Indian cliff dwellings.

A Capital Time at the Capitol

Our time here in Austin has been split with Adam working during the day while I relax at the hotel and evenings out exploring and eating. Sam's Seafood, Roaring River Steakhouse, and tonight the top all, the Le Cordon Bleu's French Restaurant, Technique.

YUM!

A three course dinner by dimmed lights at Technique felt sweet and exciting, could this be one of our last intimate dates before meeting 001? Though we've been pretty good about "dating" through our pregnancy, and especially these last few weeks in DFW there is something about a date in a different city that always feels more luxurious and focused to me.

After dinner we decided to explore the Capitol and enjoy downtown Austin. We ended up "enjoying" it at a pretty hurried pace. But here's our photo proof that in one of Texas's hottest summers, I am doing my darndest to enjoy myself with Adam. (Is it time for winter yet?)

Adam posed in front of the West Entrance of the Capitol.

In front of the North Entrance to the Capitol.

Half a Century Later

I'm sure you were all in celebration with me Monday as one of the years best holidays found us once again. I'm talking, of course, about my birthday. :)

I was a little excited and a little weirded out at the prospect of turning 25, but so far it feels good. Plus, when I'm feeling old it helps that Adam's got a year on me, that old, old man. I spent the day relaxing, much like I am most days now, and at the perinatoligst. You will all be happy to know, I'm sure, that 001 is still looking lovely and that her baseline heartbeat has dropped considerably, which is apparently another sign she's getting herself ready to meet us. They didn't give us measurements this week, though they did tell us she has big feet for being so small, haha. Not much surprise since I'm a size 10.5/11 and Adam is a size 11....she's got little hope for growing up to buy cute little size 6 shoes.

We celebrated in the evening with the yummiest sushi at this great local place not far from our house that even served complimentary saki. Obviously, only Adam got to appreciate this perk, but still. Top it off with some yummy cheesecake and you have a wonderful day. Plus, Tuesday has found me on a mini-babymoon, otherwise known as accompanying my husband on his business trip to Austin. :) Food=Yum!

Bonus! I also got to see a good friend from high school, who was also one of my bridesmaids and she gave me these beautiful birthday flowers:

Playgym Magic

Today was our shower, and a huge thank you to those of you who came and those of you who showered us at church. :)

As you can see, one of the most impressive gifts was our bottles....Truth? While excited and thankful for these bottles, this is the only shower picture where I don't look a mess...

After church this evening Adam decided it was time to assemble the baby's playgym, which Kitri studied careful and was completely afraid of once Adam turned on the music. Ha! Poor dog, we'll see how she copes with her life turning upside down soon. Duchess, predictably, slept through all the action.

*Showcasing*

*Finishing Touches*

Making Plans For Making Fun

Next week Adam has his first business trip with his new job. A short skip and hop away, Tuesday will find my guy in Austin. 'Join him' you say? Why, I believe I will! A paid for, better late then never babymoon at the Marriott in Austin sounds good to me, even if hubby will be in meetings until 5pm each day. It's been about two years since we trekked to Austin, and I'm trying to remember the restaurants we enjoyed and what there is to do outside of smoking bars. One thing I'm excited for is our restaurant as choice as a delayed birthday celebration, the Cordon Bleu's restaurant. I am also just plan excited about gettin' outta Dodge!

001 Update

Yesterday was my weekly perinatology appointment. For most babes, at 33wks and some days, weight is somewhere around 4lbs and they're just over 17in. It seems our girl is all about being above average. The doctor didn't give us length in numbers, though she did use the term "all legs"...She did say 001 is measuring at 5lbs 4oz with a nice big belly. :) Six weeks left and our girl is already just under her daddy's birth weight. Oh my!

Baby Face

On days like today I find myself dreaming during an afternoon nap of what our sweet girl will look like. I was born with nearly jet black hair, Adam platinum blonde, and most of our family is somewhere in between. She's already measuring about a week ahead; will she be a 9lb baby like her mama or even a 10lb baby like her Grandad and cousin Allie V? We know she's ahead in growth for now, but will she be a tall girl like me, or a petite thing like her grandmothers? Will her skin be fair and creamy like mine, or will she be able to tan like the Fishers and many Owens?

At the moment I have no pictures of Adam and I in our first weeks, but I do have the following pictures at several months from the wedding slide show that never was. :) My mind can go on forever trying to mesh the two images into a new person and I can never seem to really envision her. Can you imagine that from the beginning of her life God knew exactly what she would look like and she's already the perfect combination of us. Amazing to consider...

Baby Adam: Daddy

Baby Kaitlin: Mama

Reflections of Motherhood

NPR had this interesting video posted on their site, done by Nummies. The topic? What would women go back in time to tell their pregnant selves before their first child.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taDqKWWPDAY

Reupholstering Project

When we replaced our dining room table several years ago I decided to keep using our "this is our first place" chairs from Walmart and just reupholster them. That was a terrible idea. Not only were they cheap, tacky chairs, but I used nails that were too long and turned the chairs into weapons. Adam called them our "iron maidens." When we moved to Amarillo we left behind our dining room chairs and borrowed some from friends.

Fast forward to our move back to DFW, we were gifted some older chairs by Adam's parents and Adam worked on them over the weekend to make them work for us. Sanded, painted, re-cushioned and re-upholstered they are looking pretty snazzy if I do say so myself!

Before meets After

Living Your Story: Running

At church right now we're doing a series on stories. What is your story? Is it a good one, a bad one, are you really living it? Each week, in preparation for the following weeks service they release prompts to inspire thought, writing and sharing. The idea being of course that we need to share our story with others.

One thing I love about our church is that towards the end of service there is a time we call "open mic". It is literally when the microphone is open to anyone who feels compelled to share with the rest of the church in response to service, how they're being inspired or challenged by God at the moment, or even a piece of art (dance, photography, poetry, etc) that they want to share. I'm terrified of public speaking and have only shared at open mic one time in all the time we've attended. Wanting to share his story, but avoid open mic, a fellow church-goer emailed out his prompt-responses. I won't share them in full because I don't feel it's appropriate, but there is an excerpt of his response for this week that I really enjoyed.

The prompts given out for next weekend's service are as follows:

• When did you quit running?
• When did you do something you did not want to do only to find out that you loved it?
• "There was once a chance I didn't take..."
• It was Erica Jong who said, "If you don't risk anything, you risk more." Write about what that statement means to you.
  
  
  An excerpt of response:
  
  
  "I came out of the womb running. Honestly, I don't believe I ever stopped. Really, though, I'm not sure anyone ever stops running. In that regard, we are like sharks. We must constantly move. If we ever stop moving we die. I had a professor/mentor my first go in college who used to say that life is like a caravan. Sometimes you are leading the group, sometimes you are lagging behind, but the only time we get left behind is when we stop moving, and that is also when we die.

  This ties in nicely with Erica Jong's quote, "If you don't risk anything, you risk more." I think of people like Howard Hughes. Rather than face his fears and move on he withdrew and wouldn't risk, and in the end, he died isolated. This is different than dying alone. Everyone dies alone, but some die isolated. Some die by retreating to a "golden age" of their life, and they miss out on the beauty around them. Some die by never risking love, or faith, or adventure, and they end up living a life of "what ifs." Anais Nin is quoted as saying, "And then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk to bloom." I like that. It dovetails nicely with Jong.

  So, yeah, I believe we are always running. Sometimes we run toward something or someone. Sometimes we run away. Sometimes it's beautiful scenery, sometimes dull, sometimes scary. Maybe we jog or sprint or distance run, but we always run. I think that is why, in the end, God offers us rest, but in the meantime, what it boils down to is this: Which direction do you choose to run, toward or away?

  "Acquire the Spirit of Peace, and thousands of souls around you will be saved." ~ St. Seraphim of Sarov"
  
  

Updating Our "Crib"

As part of parents-to-be gift to ourselves, Adam and I re-did our bedroom. We've always enjoyed the way our bedroom has looked, but managed with Ross deals and re-gifted things. This time per one of my favorite blog's suggestions, we gave ourselves a bit of a retreat since we are gearing up for baby.

http://www.rookiemoms.com/upgrade-your-own-crib/

One trip to Ikea and Target later and we have an amazingly comfy retreat that we love!

(Please note that Ikea is not nearly as fun super pregnant as when not. There was a lot of "furniture testing.") We added blue knobs to our desk drawer where knobs were missing, invested in some heavenly soft, high thread count sheets and matching thermal curtains, and bought ourselves a soft and lovely new duvet & duvet cover along with a throw pillow and candles to compliment the rug we already had. Next, painting the walls silver!

It felt odd to put so much into ourselves, and into our room but after sleeping in our finished retreat we agreed it was so worth it.

Bigger & Better-aka 8 Months

Today marks week 32 in the 40wk pregnancy adventure! Month 8! We've made it!

Changes in the last few weeks:

• 001 has begun kicking and punching simultaneously on opposite sides of my body, making me feel as though my stomach is going to pop from being to small for her energetic body
• Occasional 'jumps' from our wee one can be noted from the outside as my whole stomach heaves with her
• While I initially celebrated my low-lying girl and felt sympathy for friends who long ago had feet in the ribs, we have recently joined the club. My right ribcage seems to be the resting place for our girl's foot, particularly felt in the evenings and sometimes making it a little harder to breathe.
• I feel full. Full of baby, full of food, but I'm hungrier now then I have been most of the pregnancy. Ironically, my weight gain has slowed down.
• We're keeping on keeping on with our Bradley Method exercises, which sometimes feel like fat-lady torture. ;)
• Remember the maternity bra I bought about two months ago? Yea, it hardly fits. It was the largest size they had in the sports bra style at Target.
• 001's peachy nursery stands ready to receive her. There are little piles of clothes on the changing table to be washed and a clock to be fixed, but it feels so cozy to walk by.

Tuesday marks our next appointment with the midwives, and our next ultrasound with the perinatologist is the following Wednesday. Hopefully I'll have more baby pictures to share!

Pride & Excitement

Now that it's official I can make the official announcement, my dear husband starts his new job this Monday at Staffmark! Fifteen minutes from our house, he's working out of the Las Colinas offices as a Senior Account Manager & Researcher with a "choose your own schedule" setup which means he'll be able to work 7:30-4:30, hopefully beat some of the traffic, and spend some time in the evenings with oo1 and myself! He received the informal offer last Thursday, but we wanted to wait to announce until the ink was drying on the paperwork.

Thank you to everyone who mentioned us in their prayers and held their breath with each new development. We greatly appreciate your support and enthusiasm!

...Now the question is, what am I going to do with myself, alone these next 8.5wks?

Dr.Masingill-The Man Who Decides

Today was our appointment with Dr. Masingill, the doctor who collaberates with the midwives should one of their patient's need a c-section or be deemed too high-risk (cough-cough) to continue on with the midwives.

I.was.nervous.

Apparently, there was no need to be. The midwives had assured me he very rarely "took one of their mothers" but that they needed him to sign off with my colorful medical chart that I could continue with the midwives and limited monitoring during labor & delivery. While we waited silently for him to come to the room I was thinking of all the reasons I could give him to leave me alone and hoped he wouldn't argue it was too risky, and why did I have to swell so much today of all days?

Instead the man who walked in was a jovial, pudgy caricature. Excitedly announcing the baby's heartbeat after listening (128), reviewing my health history and discussing how my pregnancy has progressed and my luck. After answering a few questions I had he announced there was no reason, unless some complication arose, that I couldn't stay with the midwives and have the birth I desired.

There are a few things we'll have to sacrifice.

I won't be able to hold her immediately after, because of the blood-risk she'll have to be bathed immediately instead of placed on my chest. This may seem small, and maybe it really is, but it's something that saddens me to think about. In the great scheme of things, it's a small price to pay for the birth experience I want, but it does make me feel a little robbed. In the meantime, I'll choose not to think about it and instead rejoice in the fact that despite the fact that we've got three different diseases working against us, we've been really lucky so far and it seems we'll be given a gift with our birth.

Sausage Fingers

Has anyone else had to take their wedding ring off during pregnancy? Foolishly, though I had talked about the need to make sure it didn't get stuck, I think mine is just that. Stuck on. I am desperate to avoid having to get it cut off later on, and last night declared it was the night to try and get it off. In hindsight, maybe the night I already was suffering from sausage fingers was not the night, but sausage fingers was exactly what was causing me to panic.

We tried e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. Soap, lotion, WD-40...Adam could get it just to my knuckle (after a LOT of work) and then it was hopeless. We eventually gave up due to how red and swollen my finger got at all the tugging and twisting. I even slept with an ice pack in the hopes of getting the swelling down this morning...but without much luck. Oye.

Attractive, isn't it? ;)